An Empty Feeling
by Ikirah.Useko
Summary: A moment of weakness... shall pay a massive price later on. Zero Kiryuu only learned of this... when she was forced to play in one of Kaname’s sick games, oblivious to the fact that Kaname was playing for keeps. Kaname X Zero, gender-switch


**Summary:** A moment of weakness... shall pay a massive price later on. Zero Kiryuu only learned of this... when she was forced to play in one of Kaname's sick games, oblivious to the fact that Kaname was playing for keeps — and only to learn more than she could ever possibly imagine about the Leech, and herself. Kaname X Zero, gender-switch

**Genre:** Adventure/Romance/Angst/Drama — err... unsure

**Rating:** T — just up to that, I think... sigh ...because I JUST do not know how to write IT — for I have tried, and such a failure I was. TT TT

**Disclaimer:** VK is NOT mine, and NEVER will it be. sniffles

**Warning/s:** (my, this is gonna be a long one! Ha-hah! XP)

Here, let me lay it down one by one:

1: Gender-switch – Yes, I switched a certain person's gender... who? Find out! Why? That I do not know. LOL, kidding! I just wanted to try something new... and besides, if I make this BxB, hmm, might as well be a PlotWithoutPlot. xP

2: OOC-ness – Not sure about this... but so far, I've been greatly inspired by a certain beautiful, nearly a hundred and ten year old vampire... which might have caused me to twist some behaviors here and there. Ha-hah! xD You'll see!

3: AU-ness – I'm not sure about this... but seeing that I have changed major stuff here (like gender)... then I guess it's kinda an alternative universe, noh? But I'm not yet sure 'bout the plot, though I know it definitely WILL revolve 'round Kaname X Zero. xD xD xD That, I assure you!

4: Crappy Grammar/Writing – Need not be explained, it's so obvious. Ha-hah, LOL! But here, I'll give it a brief shot. Hmm, how do I say this? Well, aside from the stated fact that My. Grammar. Sucks... expect just some simply plain writing of teh plot here. Meaning no elaborate stuffs here, so don't except any! Ha-hah! xD Constructive criticisms are great help for me! :)

5: (very)Slow Updates – I'm either just very busy lacking so much time, or I'm just being the lazy-ass that I am. LOL! Don't expect regular updates from 'lil 'ol me! Heck, it might even take me months for an update. xP Ha-hah!

Check Iki-chan's profile here on for some newsflash update! xD (I recommend checking it weekly, LOL!)

I think that's that! Well this is Iki-chan's first VK fic, and it's been a—long—while since the last time Iki-chan had written something down...

...so R&r please, and enjoy! Iki-chan shall forever be grateful

(BTW: this would be just a part of chapter 1 – since Iki-chan here had just realized that chapter 1 was just too long to finish... ha-hah!)

* * *

**Title:** An Empty Feeling

**Chapter 1:** Strong Pretenses (pt. 1)

* * *

'Weird,' I thought, as I entered the stillness and solitude of the Moon Dorm. I would've looked around, but I had already known that there was no one here but me — unless I'm not considered a person around here, that is. 'It's really empty, huh...' I muttered to myself, as my eyes, wary and cautious, caught their vacant, luxurious lounge area, sensing no presence at all.

Well it would be stupid to think that they were in hiding because of me — knowing that I would come here. I knew better than to think that the Night-class feared a rejected Vampire Hunter like me, an ex-human vampire — a D-class nearing its execution.

And I am sure that their classes had finished even before I started heading here — the chairman even said so himself.

:Flashback:

"Zero-chan! Here. Give this invitation to Kaname-kun. You need not explain a thing to him — so you're definitely fit for the job, Ms. Prefect! Just show this to him, and he'll know exactly what to do!" the chairman babbled, waving the delicate, ivory envelope, the reason for all this havoc in the midst of the tranquil night, in-front of Zero's blank, impassive face.

"Why me—?" Zero muttered inertly, her glassy eyes lacking the need to care, as she swiftly snatched the piece of white material from the chairman's unsuspecting hand.

"Because—! It's a guardian's obligation — meaning yours! — to assure safety for my beloved students of the Day-class and the Night-class!"

"Eh—?"—chairman Cross grinned eagerly at Zero's perplexed face—"...what's that got to do with this?" Zero inquired, her eyes suspicious and doubtful as it glared at the chairman, raising the flimsy envelope in the air to emphasize her point.

"Ahaha... You better get going, or else you'll be late! I believe classes are now over for the Night-class students. Hurry! Hurry!" the chairman laughed-off, ignoring Zero's query, a wide smile intact on his face, as he literally pushed Zero out the room — shutting the door right in-front of Zero's stunned face, with her mouth falling slightly in the midst of the mayhem.

:End of Flashback:

The chairman's behavior tonight was more unusual and peculiar than the way he normally behaved. I thought he sounded rather... suspicious and scheming — despite his squeaky use of tone.

It was almost as weird as the fact that the Night-class had gone mysteriously missing in thin air.

'What's up with everyone tonight?' I sighed, as I felt a cold gust of wind wrap around me.

Either something's going on...

...or it was just all in my head.

"Seriously, the disappearance of the Night-class students seemed to have at least fazed you compared to when you're surrounded with a bunch of bloodthirsty ones! Do you really love us that much, Kiryuu-chan?"

"Ichijou-senpai," I muttered, as the crescent silver moon illuminated its light past through the frosted glass panes, and made known the new, uninviting presence of the deathly Night-class student just in-front me. My Bloody Rose was already pointed at him, with only a mere imperceptible distance left for the bullet to travel in, just as there was an elegant, ghostly hand prepared to slit my throat in pieces on my neck.

"Seiren, please be careful. Kiryuu-chan here is one of our delightful guests for the evening."

"Of course."

And as she spoke, her voice flowing sinuously in the air, I felt the icy, knife-like fingers on my neck disappear, as her hand pulled back in retreat.

"Zero Kiryuu." She was still behind me as she said my name, piercing my ears with the sharpness of her voice. "Kaname-sama has been expecting you." My nose crinkled slightly as I realized how strong her scent was, that I could already feel it as my own.

"Of course," I muttered, raising the delicate, ivory envelope for them to see. The delicate, ivory envelope that 'Kaname-sama' has been expecting. Somehow, I felt my eyes become warm against the cold atmosphere — hmm, I wonder why.

"Ah, Kaname-sama is in his room right now! You can meet Kaname-sama there. Oh, do you remember where Kaname-sama's room is? You've been there before, right? My, it's prohibited to trespass in Kaname-sama's room without permission. Lucky you, Kiryuu-chan! Almost all of the Night-class students haven't been inside Kaname-sama's room. And of course, drink his bloo—Ahahaha! Would you like me to take you there? Kiryuu-chan?!"

I noticed my Bloody Rose was still pointing at him, and my finger was itching to pull the trigger — anything to shut this boy's careless mouth.

"Ichijou, they're coming."

"Ah, shoot. I almost forgot! Forgive our poor accommodations, Kiryuu-chan, but we have to go now. We still have other guests to entertain for tonight. Hope you're not offended—ah, I know! Why don't I just tell you where Kaname-sama's room—?"

"I can manage on my own, Ichijou-senpai," I muttered, and I can already taste the acrid bitterness on my tone. But I wanted them to leave now, at this instance, before I could be stupid enough to shoot — just one shot wouldn't be so dreadful, now would it? It might even be worth it.

For the first time, I seemed to have pulled back my Bloody Rose from a vampire's face... because I felt so weak and incapable of it — dammit, I feel so defeated; aren't I just so worthless?

"Alright then, Kiryuu-chan! We'll see you around!"

I'm not surprised they already found out. It was inevitable — He said so Himself. And He warned me, didn't He? Maybe I should've listened. But I did. I just didn't have enough time. Because right now, I am not prepared. Not yet, at least. And I wonder if I'll ever be.

I drank His blood, the poisonous vile, because I needed it; because I am a vampire — an ex-human vampire, a D-class nearing execution, the lowest of all. And They knew of it.

Now... everything I believe in, everything I stand for—

How shameful, aren't I?

—Shattered.

And I can't do anything about it.

_Sigh_.

"Have a good night, Ms. Prefect," I heard Seiren — the Kuran's bodyguard, as everyone would say — remark, her voice quiet and underhanded, as both their presence gradually diminished.

Honestly, I was a bit stunned by it. A tad curious, too — I mean, what was that suppose to mean? I thought she sounded like she had some double meaning in her words. Hell, what's up tonight?

'Everything's being weird tonight, huh,' I muttered to myself, a bit exasperated and exhausted, as I headed towards the room I abhor the most — Kaname Kuran's.

* * *

'The sooner I get this over with, the better,' I thought, as I heaved a quiet, apprehensive sigh once I had reached my most crucial destination here in the Moon Dorm.

I raised a fisted hand on the intricately-designed door of Kaname Kuran's room, and was about to put some force on it, too — for its awaited impact on the wooden door.

_Knock—_

"Zero Kiryuu. Who would've thought you had some decency in you?"

But a voice in the depth of the darkness broke through in the silence, and my actions ceased midway, caught-off guard, as I distinguished my new intruder.

Great, another Kuran bodyguard.

Ruka Souen.

I heard her gentle, soft laugh consuming the still air, as her footsteps gradually became closer — despite that they were barely audible in her fluid grace and elegance.

Of course, my pistol was already pointed at her silhouette, with a finger itching for the trigger. Two vampires in just a night, that's a record I'd like to keep. Too bad I wasn't able to shoot awhile ago though, perhaps now's a chance? To make amends for the occurrences awhile ago, and it'll just really make me feel better. And besides, what better way than to end the day in the Moon Dorm with a satisfying sound? — _Bang! _

One shot wouldn't hurt, now would it? Well in my case at least.

I heard her amused titter again — glad to hear that both of us are ecstatic.

"I would keep that away, if I were you," her smooth, silky voice echoed clearly in my ears, calm and unperturbed despite that my Bloody Rose was aimed at her.

"And why is that?" I asked, raising an eyebrow, curious and a bit taken aback — especially when I felt my grip on the pistol become slightly uncertain and shaky.

"Because..."—she started, sounding hesitant, her voice soft and weak, like it was so fragile it would break. "...because Kaname-sama is busy. Because right now, he is doing something very important..."—she trailed-off, and she sounded like she was trying to convince herself of something.

"And what is that?" I didn't realize I had spoken out loud, and only did when it was too late. I didn't want to sound like I was prying, or anything. But I was curious — who wouldn't be? When her face revealed from the shadows...

...it was a broken picture.

Dejected and crestfallen, her eyes were looking straight at me.

She was undeniably beautiful — every one of Them was. Glistening skin, silken hair, deep, bright eyes — she brought light in the pitch-black darkness.

It was hard to look away, and the expression she wore didn't help. But that didn't stop me from being chary and cautious around her — my face remained expressionless and unperturbed. I was still in the environment of the Blood-leeches, aren't I? Anything could happen.

"Because Kaname-sama is a descendent of the Kuran-clan, it would only mean that his blood is the purest and most original vampire blood that exists in the present times. I suppose you're already aware of it, Kiryuu-san?"—she paused, when she noticed my grip on my Bloody Rose tense-up, giving me a small smile that didn't reach her eyes—"Yes, moving on... Being the highest-ranked vampire that there is, it would be a great honor to mean something to Kaname-sama. That's why daughters of Nobles vainly try so hard to get noticed by Kaname-sama — so that they can offer their blood for him to take as he please..."—I think I know where this is getting to, but, somehow, I want to hear it myself —"Kaname-sama takes it as a responsibility to tolerate such desperate attempts, while he entertains those he deems worthy. It may seem selfish — but then again, vampires are selfish creatures — but I assure you that this is essential, and will greatly affect the existence of vampires in the future..."

'Selfish creatures? More like appalling ones,' I thought, as I watched her cold, acid expression on me.

"...so don't give me that disgusted look on your face, Kiryuu-san."

"I don't think I can," I muttered frankly, outspoken, as I clutched the chairman's envelope with my free hand, wondering now if I should still give it to the vampire prince, to the repulsing leech, to 'Kaname-sama'...

...or get out of this sickening place before it could get me any more nauseated than I already was.

Suddenly, I heard a sarcastic laugh broke through in the silence spreading amongst us, and I wasn't quite so enthusiastic to find out that she still may have found our little chit-chat rather amusing — because I certainly don't.

I stared at her, unfazed, as I steadied my Bloody Rose on her — prepared, and eager to shoot if things would decide not to play out so well.

"Stop being such a hypocrite, Kiryuu — it's disgusting. Since you, of all people, should feel the most attraction towards Him — because you drank Kaname-sama's blood, didn't you?"—she sounded like a jealous mistress for some reason, as I grasped what she was implying to me; and I'm not pleased with what she's trying to say.

"Now, don't you just wish Kaname-sama would drink yours too? Just the way you fantasize it in your—"

I didn't realize that I finally pulled the trigger of my pistol — and I barely missed her, and I was sure of it when I sensed her body stiffen, and her breath hitch for a second — until her voice was abruptly stopped by the piercing _Bang!_ of my Bloody Rose. Dammit, it was so close, and it was satisfying, but it wouldn't suffice.

"I don't know if I should loathe you more, or sympathize you..."—she spoke again, her voice soft, yet outspoken and daring — ignoring the anti-vampire weapon I still held for her — while her face remained unreadable—"...for the incidents of tonight."

Perhaps one more shot would be alright — my senses never did stop me from shooting needlessly before, so why now?

I was about to pull the trigger one more time, my ears anticipating the beautiful reverberation of the shot, if not did a fairly strong hand caught my wrist first — and staunched my movements effortlessly.

* * *

"That's enough, Ruka," broke through a calm, stern order — with his voice, velvety and husky, echoing in my ears. I ignored the sudden rapid beating of my heart, uncaring — and oblivious — of what triggered its unusual pounding, as my face scowled while I tried so hard to pull my hand out of His grasp.

But the Leech didn't even budge, nor showed any signs of letting go; he just ignored me, not even just a quick glance at me — as I noticed his focus was completely at the beautiful vampire across us.

I thought I felt a pang of envy hit me or something — dammit, my head's playing around with me once again. I could feel myself grow warm against the cold atmosphere of the night — and the warmth on my wrist probably helped, a lot.

"You may leave now," his voice murmured, so naturally gentle and smooth — that it could almost melt just anyone. I thought I sensed a soft hint of irritation on his tone.

I glanced at Souen — with my hand, of course, still bounded by the bloodsucking Leech — and I found her usual defiant front lacking from her angelic face. She looked so fragile under Kuran's acid gaze, I thought. Her eyes were watered in soft melancholy, and her face looked so defeated.

"Yes, Kaname-sama," she spoke softly; her voice felt like it was going to crack. She turned to leave; giving a curt, graceful nod before her outline completely disappeared in the shadows.

We were all alone now — just the two of us...

...and the stench of a foreign scent of blood in the air.

I thought I saw a limp figure on the floor through the slightly ajar door of His room, and then it was gone the moment my nose involuntarily crinkled at its direction — before I could even see clearly in the darkness.

Was that the girl Souen was talking about awhile ago? The girl who'd offer blood to their 'Kaname-sama'? A girl 'Kaname-sama' would deem worthy?

'Disgusting,' I thought, as I glared harder at the Leech when I heard him chuckle amusedly at my discomfort — a crooked smile on his face.

I gripped the chairman's envelope once again, as frustrations started building up, when I realized that the scent of blood was coming from His breath.

* * *

End, to be continued...

(pt. 1 of chapter 1)

**Reviews, constructive criticisms, and anything not-flame related are all greatly appreciated! **

Un-proofread: 06–02–08

**-Iki-chan :D**


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